I dun' know 'bout you. But when I gets me a game, I love to go back to the classics. The days of super May-ro, and Sanic. Yeahhh, I'm talkin' bout the 80's. Back in the day, there were so many fucking games and I loved them all. But one game, I will never touch again. I was in the video store one day, lookin' for some Nintendo Tapes when I found this one game.. called Snoop Dogg Dream Emulator. The cover of the game was weird, it was colored in an Infrared crayon, so there was no way I could've seen it. I might've gone into a different dimension a couple of times, but that's a different story.
So I went over to the register and gave the game to the man. The picture of the game had pot leaves all over it! The cashier then held me over the counter and spanked me until my eyes were as red as the infrared! That's nasty, bitch!
So I went home and played the game, and I was lovin' it like Mickey Double D's. The game was about Snoop Dogg havin' a dream. Spoiler Alert: It was a wet dream. Nicki Manage was there, but only her rectum. My eyes melted when I saw hyper-realistic shit cover the TV screen. Then I realized that my dog was on top of it. Then Snoop woke up. He then rolled a joint the size of the US National Debt and lit it. He then fell back to sleep, more stoned than a rock.
He then had another wet dream. This time he was drowning in his own semen.
Hyper.
Realistic.
Semen.
At this point, I tried shutting the game off, but the game stopped me. I was paralyzed except for my fingers and thumbs! Like NES Godzilla or some shit. But my fears only escalator when the creepy molester mailman came into my home and took advantage of the situation. All I saw was hyper-realistic semen. I didn't know if it was from the game, or the mailman! So I continue playing the game, my rectum now loaded and my pants at my ankles. Then all of a sudden, Squidward Testicles comes out of the TV and starts tentacle raping me! After that, my NES exploded, and my TV was covered in hyper-realistic carbonized carbon.
But just when I thought it was over, I got strapped to a chair and got my nipples electrocuted by none other than John Madden! The clever bastard always snuck his way into these things.
Now I know why Snoop Dogg has to smoke weed everyday.